I requested from Ashley-
friend, confidant, newly practiced in
matters of health-
that she administer a lethal dose.
I lay face-up on a hospital bed
in a starched room, and accepted first
from her a raw egg, which I swallowed
dutifully, and then a purple ball,
fruit-like, perfectly round and cut
in half. Just as I finished swallowing,
the darkness closed in and I focused
on the sensation of losing sensation,
calm and ready to end my life.
Later, I awoke. I considered what I had
done and determined that it was better
I live, as I had accomplishments yet to
attempt. I left the bed and sought
out my friends at a local eatery; others
at a bar. I hugged and thanked them
for their support, but announced that
I would be living, for now.
No one was particularly shocked one way
or the other. This was comforting.
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