you arrived at just the right moment.

so i hope

your departure is as auspicious,

blessed, monumental, needed,

inspiring, inspired, serendipitous,

divine, necessary, abbreviated

and quick

as your presence.

that is to say, you never were close by

for long. so double your efforts this time

and make your absence as brief.

or better yet,

best yet,

figure it out and find

a way to stay.

do i love myself ?

truth be told, i've learned to.

and to tell another truth,

i love you more.

cotton candy shapes

not sure if i mentioned the smaller

things that make you us and make

the boats sail. that one time i drove home

by the river after a long day and i saw you there,

enormous, resting on your side, head propped in

hand, watching my tiny ego dash by from

your bathtub. you were halfway submerged,

stretched the length of the river straight,

like a giant in low tide watching a children's toy

traffic jam. what a smile on your face,

bemused wisdom, seeing my path from a far

vantage point, loving and gentle and strong and

i thought, that's just how i imagine god. too many lives to juggle,

imperfect, adoring, watching, guiding, always confident

in me.

still here

with fewer words.

more will come, i hope.

please don't go.